25 THINGS YOU NEED TO STOP DOING TO YOURSELF NOW!
Many people tell us how to treat others, what to do to others, and how not to treat others. But a lot of people don’t tell us how to treat our selves and how not to treat our selves.
Without a doubt, life is challenging,hectic and stressful. A lot of us put our self through unnecessary stress and pain and doubt because we fail to treat our selves right.
“Who will love you if not yourself? And in our world where many are self-serving, who will put you first if not you?”
We all undoubtedly have a past that we can’t change, but the fact is you can change the present and the course of your future if you want to. The secret? Start where you are.
Here are 25 things we need to stop doing to ourselves if we truly want to be happy.
1. STOP PUTTING OTHERS FIRST:
The sad fact is that many of us do this. It could be intentional or unintentional on our parts, but we put other people wants and desires before our own. The only thing many of us need is to put our selves/needs first. Learn to say no to that pushy classmate or co-worker, learn not to say yes when what you really want to say is no. I dare you to put yourself first today and see whether or not there is a shift in your general mood or happiness.
“put yourself first, the world will adjust I promise.”
2. STOP LYING TO YOURSELF:
I really do wonder how we think we can lie to ourselves and get away with it! You can lie to everybody else, but not to yourself honey you can’t.
“At the end of the day, you are all you truly have left, that person you see in the mirror? The eyes you gaze into when you look in a mirror? You can’t lie to that person”
3. STOP TELLING PEOPLE SECRETS ABOUT YOU:
“If you stop telling your friends all about you, your enemies wouldn’t know so much about you”
This is a truth we all need to reconcile with. Stop telling people so much about you, you are only hurting yourself. Haven’t you ever heard that “your friend today might become your enemy tomorrow?”
We need to learn to keep things to ourselves, tell people very little about you and leave them guessing. Truly? Your life concerns no one. Be smart.
4. STOP RUNNING FROM YOUR PROBLEMS:
Have you not heard? You can’t outrun your problems! We might be able to leave them behind for a little while, eventually they catch up to us. We need to face our problems head on and deal thoroughly with them.
5. STOP BEING AROUND NEGATIVE PEOPLE:
Negative people always find a way to suck life out of people. They are miserable and refuse to let others be happy, they need to be avoided at all costs. Cutting negative people out of you life is the best way to love yourself. I have a whole post on Self love
6. STOP CRITICISING YOURSELF:
Self criticism helps no man ever. Give yourself a break, it’s okay to make mistakes, it’s okay to not be perfect, but it’s never okay to criticise yourself. Others find enough ways to criticise us, we don’t need to join the party. Embrace yourself, love yourself and be yourself.
7. STOP BELIEVING NEGATIVE OPINIONS OF OTHER PEOPLE:
We need to stop letting other people negative opinions change our own opinions of ourselves. Chances are these people are projecting their own personal feelings about themselves to you, and you let them. Don’t let anyone tell you that you aren’t smart or beautiful. Believe those things in your heart because you are beautiful and special and smart and amazing and the best part? You are you! Nothing else matters.
8. STOP PUTTING YOURSELF DOWN:
We need to stop this, like yesterday. What has putting yourself down done for you? Nothing positive? Then drop it.
9. STOP BEING MEAN TO YOURSELF:
I used to do this, I used to be mean to myself. I would tell myself all kind of negative things about myself and not treat my self right. This lead to a very terrible case of self-doubt and self-esteem issues and willingness to accept what i did not deserve. This lead to a few very very bad choices. But I’m grateful I’m was able to turn this around to love myself before I totally destroyed myself. You can do it too, start with the small things, compliment yourself, tell yourself you are smart and beautiful and special and you will start believing those things and eventually you will become those things. Learn to be nice to yourself.
10. STOP TRYING TO BE SOMEONE YOU ARE NOT:
We can’t all be Beyoncé or Rihanna or Katy Perry. But you can be you and no one else is you and that’s your power. Why would you want to anyone else? Why? When you are beautiful and unique? We need to drop that mentality today, you can’t be anyone also but you, you will only be frustrated on the long run.
11. STOP SETTING YOURSELF UP TO FAIL:
Many ask how can I set myself up to fail? By setting unrealistic expectations for yourself.
I get it we all want to be successful and have a fabulous life, at least I do. But don’t aim for the 50th floor from the ground floor, get closer like the 40th floor maybe. Set goals that you can actually accomplish, don’t set yourself up to fail.
12. STOP BEGGING PEOPLE TO STAY:
I am begging you please don’t do this. I once begged an ex to stay, he did stay but left eventually, but not before beating my self-esteem to the ground. I did learn a lesson, but I made a fool out of myself first. Don’t beg anyone to stay it’s not worth it. Let them go.
If someone can’t see what an amazing person you are, don’t make a point of trying to prove anything to them. Just show them the door.
13. STOP GIVING UP ON YOURSELF:
Many of us give up on ourselves, Maybe after a bad relationship or even some setbacks. Giving up on yourself is the worst thing you can do to yourself. Even if everyone else gives up on you, don’t do that to yourself.
14. STOP HOLDING ON TO THE PAST:
The past could be anything. It could be a failed relationship, a broken family or friendship or anything. But did you know that holding on to the past can sometimes be more painful that letting go and facing the future?
15. STOP LETTING YOUR PAST DICTATE YOUR FUTURE:
Don’t allow that thing that happened to you in the past stand in the way of your future happiness, let it go. So you had a bad relationship in the past? What make you sure this one will be bad too? There is a saying where I come from. It goes “If your close your eyes to allow an evil man pass, a good man will also pass by without you knowing” the meaning? Forgive the past, forget the experience not the lessons and let go of the past.
16. STOP EXPECTING OTHERS TO MAKE YOU HAPPY:
I am guilty of this and so are many of us. I used to depend on others for my happiness and I was always dissatisfied and unhappy, then I learned to be my own happiness and the game changed. You need to learn to be your own happiness, your own reason for laughing, your own reason for continuing to breathe. You need to be your everything.
17. STOP PROCRASTINATING:
We need to stop procrastinating, do what needs to be done at the right time.
18. STOP COMPROMISING:
Want to have a happy life? Then stop compromising. Stop compromising on the kind of man/ woman you want to be with, on the kind of friends you keep, on your values and standards.
20. STOP COMPARING YOUR LIFE WITH OTHERS:
Please and please stop doing this! Stop comparing yourself to others you are your own unique person with unique experiences. Comparison will lead to frustration and self hate and an unfulfilling life.
20.STOP TRYING TO BE PERFECT:
There is no such thing as the perfect man or perfect woman. We are all flawed but beautifully so. Stop hurting yourself trying to be perfect. You are perfect in your imperfections.
21. STOP FOLLOWING THE MAJORITY:
So ten people think the wrong thing is right, stand your ground even if you will be standing alone. Don’t follow the majority to do wrong just because you want to please anyone.
22. STOP LETTING OTHERS USE YOU:
I have a whole post on how not to be used by others read it Here
23. STOP FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF:
We need to stop feeling sorry for ourselves. It changes nothing. ”Time spent worrying is time wasted”
24. STOP SAYING NEGATIVE THINGS TO YOURSELF:
Do you know that there is power in your tongue? Stop saying negative things to yourself. If you want something even is you cannot see it happening now speak it to existence. Eventually it will manifest in your life. Be careful what you say to yourself.
25. STOP LIVING TO IMPRESS OTHERS:
This is the biggest lesson I’ve learnt this year. To live for my self not for the acceptance of others. Try living for yourself today I promise it takes off unnecessary pressure off you.
All the best loves,